Pinnacle Security: FAIL
July 2, 2009
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Posted by Aubrey Turner
I am finding of late that despite my “NO SOLICITORS” sign a number of people are still ringing my bell during the day. One of these days I will get another one for the religious people (as they all seem to think they aren’t solicitors, but are doing “God’s work” or something). Anyhow, most of the remaining non-religious solicitors are ones who want to argue with you as to whether they are a solicitor or not.
Today’s award for “reading comprehension FAIL” goes to the representative for Pinnacle Security who rang the bell even though he clearly saw the sign. I opened the door and he immediately launched into his spiel about how he was visiting with people in the neighborhood who had security systems. I immediately stopped him and asked if he’d seen the sign and knew about Keller’s soliciting ordinance. His answer was that he was not a solicitor and he didn’t need a permit because he didn’t take money; instead he was just doing “marketing.” I told him that I a) I considered him a solicitor, and b) I had an alarm and didn’t need or want any “upgrades.” He tried once again to launch into his spiel, but I stopped him and told him to leave. He gave me a strange look like he was considering something, but instead said, “I’ll leave whenever you want.” Which had me thinking, Why are you still here, then?, but I didn’t say it, as he finally got the message from my expression that he was quickly moving from annoyance to potential threat and decided to leave.
It only occurred to me afterwards that perhaps he got a glimpse of the Springfield XD 40 that I was carrying. It was not intentional, but earlier I had been fiddling with the radio in my truck and my garage was hot so I took off my outer shirt. When he arrived I was just wearing an undershirt and I had to scramble to get my shirt to cover the gun. I left it unbuttoned, though, which is why in hindsight it’s possible that he saw it. Of course, this being Texas, if you freak out when you discern that the resident of the house has a gun you’re probably not cut out for door-to-door solicitation jobs.
Categories: Bloodsuckers, Personal Life Stuff
I’ve answered the door many times with a gun in my waist band. My house, my rules. The UPS guy is used to it now, but the Mormon and Jeihova’s (sp???) Witnesses are still freaked out by it.
Just for fun, I looked over that section of the Keller Municipal Code you referenced, and I noted that it actually *includes* the religious solicitors: subsection (c) includes “for the purpose of securing an audience with the occupant and engaging in or attempting to engage in charitable, religious or publication solicitation”. “Solicitation” includes soliciting your membership in their faith/philosphy/cult/club, so feel free to whip-out the rolled-up newspaper on these folks too!
Wolf,
While the ordinance references religious solicitors, I’ve been told by the Keller Police that they don’t enforce that section due to a Supreme Court decision that makes such ordinances unconstitutional. I did some digging and came up with WATCHTOWER BIBLE & TRACT SOCIETY OF NEW YORK, INC., et al. v. VILLAGE OF STRATTON et al., which is the most recent case. It appears that the court has thrown out every ordinance or law in the past 50 years or so that has attempted to restrict religious solicitors.
Somehow that just doesn’t seem right, does it? How is it unconstitutional? The ordinance doesn’t forbid religious solicitation in any way, it requires that solicitors (religious or otherwise) obey the request of the resident of the property. Sounds to me like the Supreme Court needs more Keller-type common-sense than they’ve been showing for the last 50 years. But that’s just me being old an’ grumpy.